Out of the Chaos

This story is a very important story to me personally.  It has had a profound personal and transformational impact on my life at a very vulnerable time in my life, but in a way you might not expect, but before I get to that I need to talk about the story. 

A favorite axiom of mine is, “I take the bible seriously not literally.”  There is no section of scripture where, I believe, that axiom applies more fully than with these verses from Genesis. 

Some treat these verses as if they are a literal scientific description of the beginning of the universe, and in so doing set up an untenable and unnecessary conflict between the perspectives of modern science and the ancient world view of 2500 years ago.  This literal view forces us into a choice between the two perspectives implying that accepting one means the total rejection of the other.  I believe nothing could be further from the truth.  The problem that a literal reading presents is that it is two-dimensional.  It doesn’t take seriously the critical third dimension that the Bible was written by human beings who were living in a specific cultural and historical situation and the biblical text reflects the world view of its time; that it’s embedded in real history; in real lives; in real situations. 

Before we can ever begin to understand what this passage might mean for us, we must endeavor to understand what it meant for the community from which it came.  If we don’t, we commit an injustice to the scripture, and we insult the community from which it came.    

Some say that this story is an explanation as to how things were created, but my best judgment is that this story has nothing to do whatsoever with how things were created – that’s not what the story is about.  It's not the story’s purpose to provide a scientific explanation of creation.  Simply stated the story is not science, but theology.  It wasn’t taught in ancient Hebrew science class, as if there even was such a thing. That was not the role this story played in its community of origin, nor should it be the role it plays for us.  Using the story in such a way distracts and prevents us from seeing the real truth and power of the story.  So, if it is not an explanation of how, then what is it?  For me, this story is a testimony to the nature of the creative Spirit of God; a testimony to the ancient Hebrew community’s experience of God’s creative energy working in their lives, in their community and in their life situation.

We must pay attention to a few of the story’s details.  The thrust of the story is not that God created ex nihilo, that is “out of nothing.”  The core message of the story is that the creative energy of God brings order and goodness out of disorder and chaos.  “In the beginning when God created the heavens and the earth, the earth was a formless void and darkness covered the face of the deep…”  It is critical to note that “deep” is a word that in Hebrew means “great waters.”    

We must appreciate the ancient world view's perspective on "great waters." They viewed the "great waters" as the abode of chaos – not evil - but chaos - disorder, absence of purpose, deficiency of design and definition.  They believed that ‘in the beginning” there was nothing but water, water everywhere - water above, water below, water all around - a universe of water – metaphorically a universe of total chaos – the totality of existence was chaos.  If you doubt that water can symbolize chaos, then just ask the residents of Washington State what water represents to them right now.  

The story continues, “…while a wind from God swept over the face of the waters.  Then God said, let there be light.”  It is critical that we understand that the word for “wind” in Hebrew also means “spirit” and “breath.”  So God’s spirit, metaphorically the very breath of God blows across the chaos and this formless mass of chaos begins to take on shape, design, and a purpose.  It's an amazing and awesome story.  Little by little, step by step, day-by-day more beauty and goodness emerge and explode out of the chaos - all by the creative energy of God.  And what was the light?  It wasn’t the sun, moon or the stars, for according to the story they weren’t created until the fourth day.  The light is a metaphor for the very presence of God.  So, for these ancient Hebrews to worship God the Creator meant to affirm that God’s presence surrounded and engulfed them like light, and that God’s creative energy brought forth beauty, form, and purpose from the raw material of chaos.

This story emerged from the heart of the Jewish community and their experiences at a time in their history when they were experiencing great chaos – the experience of exile.  Biblical scholars tell us that this story originated in the Hebrew community around 540 – 520 BCE and what was happening at that time?  In 586 BCE, in an attempt to inflict a fatal wound upon Jewish people, the Babylonians invaded Palestine, destroyed Jerusalem and the temple, the very heart and core of Judaism.  The people were displaced from their homeland to various parts of the empire.  It precipitated an extended time of great cultural, religious, economic and social chaos and upheaval for the Hebrew people. 

In the 540’s the Persian Empire, under Cyrus, brought an end to the domination of the Babylonians.  The prophet Isaiah even called Cyrus the Lord’s “anointed,” that is “messiah” – one who would play the key role in restoring the Hebrew people to Palestine – and that’s exactly what happened.  In 538, the victorious Cyrus issued an edict that allowed the exiles to return to Palestine, and before long construction began on the rebuilding of the temple – order and goodness were returning.  It was in the crucible of the chaos of exile that this story of their creator God originated and emerged.  The core message of the story for the Jewish people was that to worship their Creator God was to trust it was God’s intention to bring order and goodness out of upheaval and chaos.  The story is a testimony to that experience. 

I mentioned earlier that this was a significant story for me in a deeply personal way.  I have briefly mentioned a couple of times that in 1992 my life descended into chaos.  Because of stress, burnout and some other things, I fell into a depression, went on leave from call and experienced a period that felt to me very much like exile; a state of chaos: fragmented, lost, hopeless and confused.  However, I began to experience God’s creative energy through a wise and insightful counselor who encouraged me in the practice of Lectio Divina – an ancient exercise of meditative reading of the scripture.  This story from Genesis, among other biblical stories, became central to my healing and empowerment.  As I opened my life up to counseling, meditative prayer and the encouragement of trusted others, I can honestly say that I experienced, what I am comfortable in naming, the creative energy of God -little by little, day by day, week by week, month by month restoring order, goodness and hopefulness in my life.

I believe we all live in tension between chaos and order that we experience in big and little ways, obvious and subtle ways every single day.

We experience it in the tension of sickness and wellness.  As hard as we might try to pursue health and well-being, the chaos of un-wellness invades as an unwelcome intruder.  In the past 6 years I have had ten orthopedic surgeries.  I have so much metal in my body I almost short out the metal detectors at the airports! It has certainly, at times over these last six years, felt to me like chaos is trying to move in, take me over and swallow me up – only to experience in the midst of the chaos the grace of healing; a gift from God built into this frail frame that has restored a great measure of the goodness of health and well-being.

I want to share something.  As I think back on my life, the one thing I can say for sure is that I have survived; after 60 years and ten months I have made it to this day.  There have been times I never thought I would, and times I nearly didn't.  If I am honest I admit there have been a few times that deep in my being, I almost hoped I wouldn't, mired in despair ready to give up on the whole thing.

I have seen enough grief and pain to freeze the blood and turn my heart to stone - who hasn't?  Many times I have followed too much the desires of my heart, and then there were those times my heart was calling out to me to be brave, to be compassionate, to be kind, to be concerned, to be an advocate - and some of those times I chickened out.

As I look back on my life, I remember countless times when I might have given up, gone under, when humanly speaking I might have gotten lost and never been found.  But I didn't.  I have not given up.  My heart has not turned to stone and I have not become lost beyond finding.  I believe that each of you, with all the memories you have and all the tales you could tell, you also have not given up.  You also have survived and you are here this morning in this special place, partly I would imagine, because you don't want to give up and you don't want your heart to turn to stone - but to be renewed. 

What does it all tell me?  It tells me that as weak as I can sometimes be, a strength beyond my own has pulled me through - at least this far.   As foolish as I can sometimes be, a wisdom beyond my own has flickered up just enough to light a path through the darkness.  As faint of heart as I can sometimes be, a love greater than my own has welled up from within me and kept my heart alive.

Who or what was with me all those years, especially at those times I wasn't even aware of it?  Who or what do I have to thank?  Was it just luck?  Was it merely just my own innate ability to survive?  Or was it something more?  Perhaps it was a grace beyond my ability to fully comprehend – God’s creative energy that has followed me, embraced me and welled up from within me all along the way, especially when I was neck deep in chaos. 
      That's what the ancient Hebrews would say, and so they told a story about how God’s creative energy kept their hearts alive so that others would know who to thank. 
      That's what the early followers of Jesus would say for they experienced in his life this same creative energy at work filling him and spilling out of his life, and it was so life-giving they absorbed some of his life into theirs – by faith – and they experienced the goodness of a new purpose and hope emerge from their chaos of despair - and they knew who to thank and who to live for.

How is God’s creative energy of God experienced?  I cannot say exactly, other than I am convinced it emerges in more ways than we could ever imagine. I know we can't control it, but can only open my life to it.   I have experienced it: in worship; in sacrament; in reflection and contemplative prayer; in reading stuff that challenges me; quite often as I’ve opened myself to others in the exchange of ideas and experiences; and sometimes it just wells up from some deep place within me through insight, intuition and imagination.  I believe it comes through a relationship with God however you define or experience that.

This ancient Hebrew story is a testimony to the grace of God’s creative energy.  The life of Jesus and the gospel testimony of his followers point me to the grace of God's creative energy.  I pray that our lives will be a living testimony to it as well as we tell our stories.