God always was...
                   always is -
                              always will be -
                                              never will there not be God. 
What is this life
                  and this world
                              and this universe 
                                               of which we are a part,

but the explosive expression of the being of God
                  in which everything that is -
                                                     is included and within -
                             good and evil -
                  holy mystery....  ever expansive realm... 

******************

I Am Inheritance 

O blessed inheritance, you carry me to ecstasy.
O cursed inheritance, you drag me to deepest despair.
From tenacity to neurosis
From compassion to compulsion
I ride you like a raft in white-water
  through times of exhilaration and fear
  fulfillment and apprehension 

I look inside my soul and see that I am inheritance
From my father this and my mother that
From ancestors unknown and long before
  are planted the conflicting and compatible aspects of my being
I am made up of the miraculous complexity of generations
  the blessings and curses of others
I am inheritance

But also I am beautifully reconstituted by the Master Artist
  using the raw materials of inheritance and something new
  to create a unique being, one-of-a-kind
  the likes of never seen before
I am inheritance and yet so much more 

How I have used and misused that which has been bequeathed to me!
Have I explored the mystery of it and
  discovered its uniqueness and singular quality?
Have I looked for and used its strengths to the fullest?
Have I revealed and understood the weaknesses
  to see how even they can be transformed from liability to asset?

 I am inheritance but I am more – so much more
For I have received a bequest from my divine Parent
Gifts and qualities embedded within me
plethora to be discovered and put to work to the glory of the Giver. 

**************

sell your soul

sell your soul Christian
to the color-blind who say life is black and white
allowing only colors of red and blue
confusing white as red and black as blue

sell your soul Christian
to the over-simplifiers
masters of manipulation
using fear as their bait

sell your soul Christian
to the merchants of deception
who mistake expediency
for divine wisdom

sell your soul Christian
and go a find a verse
that affirms your narrowness
and ignores the larger testimony of grace

 sell your soul Christian
to the power mongers
who reduce and cheapen the kingdom of God
to a political ideology

 sell your soul Christian
to phony warriors who say that warfare is God’s will
that diplomacy is weakness
that seeking understanding is bankrupt and useless

 sell your soul Christian
to those who defend unborn life
but refuse to advocate for vulnerable children
who need health care

 sell your soul Christian
to the exploiters who see earth
not as a gift of a Creator
but an object for self-indulgence

 sell your soul Christian
to the oppressors of the poor
who use power to take advantage
of the weak and “inferior”

 sell your soul Christian
to those use religion to justify hate and prejudice
use religion to excuse self-indulgence
use religion to turn their heads in ignorance and indifference
use religion to advance self over others
use religion to marginalize, minimize and condescend

 sell your soul Christian
and practice selective grace - which is no grace at all
I will do everything in my power
to convince you to sell your soul – without shame or conscience

             - the devil

**************** 

jacob, o jacob

jacob, o jacob
heel-grabber and trickster
the spurious impersonator
living by cunning and ire
a charlatan and liar

jacob, o jacob
all along in life's game
he sought nothing but fame
though born second best
made winning his quest

jacob, o jacob
conspirator with mother
to deceive his old father
stealing the sacred from brother
in quest of all honor

jacob, o jacob
God’s holy blessing
divine promise extending
ladder to heaven
sweet dreams were his leaven

jacob, o jacob
at Jabbok so prideful
imagining triumphant arrival
then out of the night
came God’s holy fright

jacob, o jacob
in that mysterious event
came his equivalent
at his hour of prevailing
he ended up failing

jacob, o jacob
pathetically grasping
for God’s holy blessing
humility his station
and finally salvation

jacob, o jacob
at last he came home
from where he'd far roamed
on his knees 'fore his brother
reconciled with the Other

jacob,o jacob
towards the sunrise light
with a limp ever so slight
bearing the insignia of defeat
that is victory replete

jacob, o jacob
when arrogance rules
it is my name too
then I pray for the foe
who can wound and heal my soul

***************

i don't know how you did it

i don’t know how you did it
with the plots against you
knowing in Jerusalem death lurked in the shadows
yet you went anyway 

i don’t know how you did it
not striking back
when they slapped your face
and disdainfully laughed

i don’t know how you did it
not exploding with rage
when you were treated as sub-human
for speaking the truth in love 

i don’t know how you did it
after the insults and taunts
kangaroo court and hideous crucifixion
to say, “Father, forgive them,” and mean it!

i don’t know how you did it
to not resist with scorn
when spikes of iron
were driven through your sweet flesh

i don’t know how you did it
to not return contempt
with greater contempt
insult for insult; lie for lie

i don’t know how you did it
not losing your dignity
continuing to love and forgive
in the face of humanity gone mad

i don’t know how you did it
I explode
from anger and resentment
when set set up and accused

i don’t know how you did it
i cannot wield such love
you ask the impossible of me
can you forgive me?

****************

WHY?

Kingdom of world
appealing to my desires
petitioning my lust
filling me up with emptiness
bloating me from malnutrition 

Kingdom of world
seducing me with golden calves
whose gold does not glitter
making big promises
giving no life - only taking

Kingdom of world
mighty lies - power is fulfillment
security is joy
things yield bliss
darkness is light

kingdom of world
stealing my humanity
gutting my soul
rendering me a hollow shell
faceless, lifeless, spiritless, worthless

kingdom of world
your sweet smile
concealed lust
stalking me like prey
preparing to assault 

kingdom of world
loving me as fodder
seeking to satisfy
voracious appetite
parasitical bloodsucker 

kingdom of world
deceitful liar
pretender, imposter, fraud, fake
concealed intention
hidden agenda 

kingdom of world
your prince sets a trap
to steal my freedom
i step into its jaws
to be willingly ensnared 

kingdom of world
you love me not
paradox, irony
intrigued with my own demise
i worship you

why?

***************

In God's Name

Forgive us, Lord
for being too cowardly
to take accountability for our actions 

In order to appease what little conscience we have
we explicitly and implicitly
self-assuredly
with no shame
or
remorse
flaunt our sins in the faces of others
using your holy name as sanction

In God’s name
            we justify intolerance
In God’s name
            we ignore the pain of others
In God’s name
            we excuse self-indulgence
In God’s name
            we rationalize condescension
In God’s name
            we restrict participation of others
In God’s name
            we condone homophobia
In God’s name
            we hate lifestyles we do not understand
In God’s name
            we tolerate collateral damage
In God’s name
            we choose to remain conveniently ignorant
In God’s name
            we loathe political affiliations different from ours
In God's name
             we excuse our violence
In God’s name
            we wage war against others
In God’s name
            we confuse nation with kingdom of God
In God’s name
            we detest the ethnicity of others
In God’s name
            we judge who is patriotic and who is not
In God’s name
            we denounce those socially or economically inferior
In God’s name
            we fear anyone different
In God’s name
            we abhor darker skin pigmentation
In God’s name
            we will torture for confession
In God’s name
            we will blow others away if necessary

In God’s name
            Jesus forgave his executioners
In God’s name
            Jesus welcomed the outcast
In God’s name
            Jesus blessed the peacemakers
In God’s name
            Jesus warned the rich and powerful
In God’s name
            Jesus admonished the self-righteous
In God’s name
            Jesus touched the unclean
In God’s name
           Jesus commended the ethnic outsider
In God’s name
            Jesus took the sword from the disciple’s hand
In God’s name
            Jesus loved his enemies
In God’s name
            Jesus affirmed the weak and poor
In God’s name
            Jesus wept for a world ignorant of the things that make for peace
In God’s name
            Jesus fought evil with suffering love
In God's name
            Jesus was faithful to the imperatives of divine love
In God’s name
            Jesus died for his enemies

Forgive us, Jesus, for the ways
we grotesquely
            twist   distort   disfigure   warp
the character and intentions of you and God your parent

You created us in YOUR image
and we recreate you in OUR various images
to fit our idolatrous schemes

A profane and blasphemous contrast
exists between you and us
so stark
we cannot bear to really see
who you are
or who we are

We conveniently live an illusion
a contrived reality
convincing ourselves
that our plots of treachery
are your truest will and character

strip away our deceit
expose our treason
put to death our sedition
crush our duplicity
burn away the ways we live your name in vain

In God’s name
            forgive us

****************

roadkill

unsightly spectacle
poor pathetic creature
flattened in the fast lane of life
by powers infinitely bigger
crushing out life in one swift blow
mortally wounding
inflicting a tortured death

passers speed by hardly noticing
if its too bloody turn their heads the other way
vultures circle - hover
then swoop down
to devour the carcassed remains
until scarcely a trace is left
and life goes on as if nothing occurred

unsightly spectacle
poor pathetic creature
flattened on a cross
hung by a highway
by other pathetic creatures
mortally wounding
vultures gather below
mocking – gambling – laughing
passers speed by hardly noticing
dead as any other roadkill ever was dead
and life went on as if nothing occurred
or did it?

***************

little child

little child
let me console you
i know you feel alone
and afraid, doubting self
you push others away in your pain
in your panic and fright
little child
let me console you

little child
let me comfort you
i know you cry yourself to sleep
burying sobs in your pillow
so that no one will know
your sorrow and despair
little child
let me comfort you

little child
let me love you
your sense of rejection is great
you question your self-worth
you agonize
about who you are
little child
let me love you

little child
let me hold you
tightly with my strong yet tender arms
feel my acceptance
experience assurance
in the security of my embrace
little child
let me hold you 

little child
i want you to know
that you are not alone
there is a love for you
greater than you can ever imagine
you do matter
you are a treasure
believe it
little child
i love you
you are loved
o little child
in me!

***************

not long ago

not long ago
i was vital and full of life
but now I shuffle along corridors
wandering aimlessly
with tiny silent steps
marching to nowhere
curled over like the last autumn leaf
looking at the floor
muttering senseless monologue

what happened?

i see forms of people
i try to reach out
yearning to connect
still something human remains
that recognizes others
as a source of comfort

but more often than not
they avoid me
walk past me
talk past me
as if I am not there
i am
and i am not

why have i been sentenced to purgatory?
for what purpose
living death
hollow existence
vital signs devoid of essence?
i exist only in the memory of others

does god remember me?

***************

subterfuge

a war of bullets and blood is hell
but no less hellish than a war of subterfuge
a guerilla war without a front
waged with the projectiles of words
propelled with the firearms of anger
not directly aimed at the enemy
but aimed at others who will deflect
eventually doing the killing for the attacker
and accomplish the objective of the mission

how do i defend against such an invisible offensive?
by waging a like-minded war
making it a test of skill in deceit and treachery?

where is the divine in such a scenario
but hanging on the cross

how God must grow weary
of seeing the son go to the cross again and again
not choosing sides but standing alone in between
taking into his soul the slugs of verbal lead
not meant to kill the body but slay the truth
untruth unleashed to kill the soul and solidarity

yet God has no need to choose sides
for the conflict is too complex
too many shades of gray
no clear black and white
since reality has been distorted and virtualized
it is vanity to insist upon innocence

so what do i do
what choice is left
and is it a choice if only one choice remains?

seeking clarity i reach out to touch his lifeless form
in futility to awaken him
all i get are my hands smeared with thick and gooey red

i am angry that he had to die in this conflict not of his making
i am angry that I am in it like it or not
i am angry that I cannot simply declare my innocence and be done with it
i am angry that all he gives me of his is blood

but I know nothing in life is so simplistic
what do I do
what choice do I have
but the one he already made for me

i will not fight
i will not take up arms
i will die taking up no defense if called upon

maybe then the war will end and losses minimized

***************

like a spiral galaxy

like a spiral galaxy
i am at the mercy of conflicting powers
centrifugal force that would tear me apart
and fling my fragments into the outer darkness of space

but yet at the center of my being
is a resident density
so strong and bright
that i am held together by the power of its loving force

so instead of being flung haphazardly into oblivion
i am held together and shaped into a most marvelous pattern
that brightens the darkness of the space i occupy
and adds beauty and expression to the universe

***************

death and life in the depths
 

there is a fear
it incubates deep in my being
hiding in a place out of sight
it controls me in ways I despise
causing me to invest in external things
      that cannot fill the empty space
      lighten the black hole
      calm the fright
      satisfy my need for love and assurance and peace and joy